Ok you guys, I just disabled my OkC profile. It seems that the new girl and I really hit it off last weekend, and I'm just not really interested in continuing to go on dates for now. Sorry, OkC, it's been fun!
But, last weekend was even funner :) We went exploring in some strange industrial parts of Jersey, came back to my house and cooked up a vegan feast, watched movies, talked and talked and talked, and she ended up sleeping over and spending part of the morning as well. What I really like about her - besides that she is really cute and weird and shares a whole bunch of my interests - is that she seems really honest and forthright. She initiated the first kiss - just outright suggested it while we were sitting on this pier - as well as said that she would like to not have sex right away (I agree, for once in my life). We even talked about that whole "oh god, I just woke up in someone else's bed, what am I thinking?" scenario - I've been there more than I like to admit - but somehow the discussion was not uncomfortable or full of pressure, and the next morning just seemed natural and easy. So, although it's too soon to say we're in a relationship or anything, I'm bowing out of this blog and OkC for privacy's sake and to see where things go. Thanks for being such a nice place to vent and spill my guts! I will continue to visit to read what the rest of you lovely ladies are up to. Happy trails!
Showing posts with label bikingpretty. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bikingpretty. Show all posts
Monday, March 1, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Last Sunday and the Waiting Game
Sorry for the delay, I'm sure you're dying to hear about Sunday and how the dilemma was resolved. Of course, y'all were right about it resolving itself, I was just a bit nervous is all. Anyway, what happened was we left the plans deliberately open and ended up meeting up first with my visiting friends and seeing them off, and then taking a long walk around my neighborhood and having a late lunch at a cute neighborhood coffee shop. Things were...a bit underwhelming. I'm not sure if I was giving off a "let's just be friends" vibe or if she was nervous about having just met my friends, or something entirely different (I'm so bad at reading this kind of situation!), but it was exceedingly cordial and non-romantic. The closest it came to being the least romantic was when we kind of linked arms for a bit during the walk, but that was all. No kissing or nothin. Whew! We ended it with, "Well, maybe we'll see each other again," which in my experience means, "Have a nice life!" Which I guess in the context of internet dating is totally acceptable. But of course to me, a person who feels bad even ignoring an unwelcome wink on OKC, feels just a bit cold.
Well anyway. The new girl is still away on vacation, but I couldn't wait and sent her a "how's it going, wanna hang out saturday?" email on Monday. She wrote back to say she would be away this weekend as well, but suggested something early next week. So, as usual I am nervous. But we'll see what happens and I will refrain from checking out her OKC profile and thinking about how awesome she is. For the next five days, she does not exist.
Well anyway. The new girl is still away on vacation, but I couldn't wait and sent her a "how's it going, wanna hang out saturday?" email on Monday. She wrote back to say she would be away this weekend as well, but suggested something early next week. So, as usual I am nervous. But we'll see what happens and I will refrain from checking out her OKC profile and thinking about how awesome she is. For the next five days, she does not exist.
Labels:
bikingpretty,
esl instructor,
new girl,
second date,
walks
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Dilemma
So, Internet, I have a minor dilemma. If you will remember from the monster post of a few days ago, I had a marathon date on Sunday with the ESL instructor and we agreed to hang out again as soon as my houseguests of this week went home. There have been a few texts exchanged in the interim (she sent a picture of a dog at the park with a cute note), and plans were made for Sunday.
Then yesterday, a girl I had been messaging with a little bit (and who I thought seemed really rad) invited me to go to a show at my favorite venue in the city. So we ended up hanging out last night and it was...awesome. We have a ton of things in common, from specific interests to general outlook on life. She is really hot in a totally nerdy kind of way and seems grounded and compassionate and spontaneous and quirky. She is pretty much the exact kind of person I want to date, and she said she wants to hang out again. She's going out of town for a week (which is why the last-minute plans last night) but we have plans to take a walk next week.
So, what should I do? Would it be disingenuous to go out with the ESL instructor on Sunday if I know I'm kind of smitten with the new girl? If there were no new girl, I think I'd be really excited about Sunday, but now I'm worried that I'll make things awkward. But if I do go on Sunday (which I feel like is the only polite thing to do) and I feel weird about it, what do I say? Ohhhh, I hate hurting people's feelings.
Then yesterday, a girl I had been messaging with a little bit (and who I thought seemed really rad) invited me to go to a show at my favorite venue in the city. So we ended up hanging out last night and it was...awesome. We have a ton of things in common, from specific interests to general outlook on life. She is really hot in a totally nerdy kind of way and seems grounded and compassionate and spontaneous and quirky. She is pretty much the exact kind of person I want to date, and she said she wants to hang out again. She's going out of town for a week (which is why the last-minute plans last night) but we have plans to take a walk next week.
So, what should I do? Would it be disingenuous to go out with the ESL instructor on Sunday if I know I'm kind of smitten with the new girl? If there were no new girl, I think I'd be really excited about Sunday, but now I'm worried that I'll make things awkward. But if I do go on Sunday (which I feel like is the only polite thing to do) and I feel weird about it, what do I say? Ohhhh, I hate hurting people's feelings.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Dates #2, 3, and 4
For some reason, this weekend was packed with dates. Not because of Chinese New Year, and certainly not because of Valentine's day. But it just kind of fell that way, and the coming week will be packed with houseguests, and I just don't like putting stuff off. So, now it's quick and dirty update time.
Date #2 with Movie-boy. To refresh your memory: I contacted him first, we geeked out on the first date at an ale house, but I did not see any definite sparks. He called the very next day to suggest a movie later in the week, and heeding the internet's advice, I decided to give it another whirl. So. I'm not going to generalize this particular experience into a definitive answer to the "can spark grow when there's no spark at first," but in this case, the answer is a definite no.
The date itself was pretty good. We went to the a la carte section of Whole Foods for a bite, because it's kind of a pain to find vegan restaurants and because it's cheap if you're already going out. We sat upstairs and chatted, then wandered over to the Rubin Museum, which has a great Friday night movie thing where you buy a drink and get to take it into the movie theater which has chairs and tables with little tea lights instead of movie theater seating. The movie was totally weird and kind of hilarious, and I enjoyed the atmosphere, which was equally divided between old couples who are still totally doing date night and young people clearly on first dates.
So, Movie-boy kept kind of shifting in his seat every time I would move and I could tell right then that something was up. I should have known - but was nevertheless surprised - when he pulled the yaaaawn-and-now-my-arm-is-around-your-shoulders magic trick! I am not kidding. This move, which I thought could only be observed in action in the fictional world of Happy Days, is apparently alive and flourishing. To his credit, I think it was a risky move. But, um, having neither attempted nor received any flirtatious gestures whatsoever up to this point, it was just a bit much. The conversation all night had felt a bit mechanical. A lot of stuff about work, occasionally a polite question about family members or friends, but there was never a point where I felt we were really connecting. Anyway, after breaking the physical contact barrier, he did a lot of shoulder and arm stroking for the rest of the movie, which was not off-putting, but again definitely not inspiring, either.
If I were smart, I would have said thank you for a lovely evening right after the movie. But alas, I did not think quickly and ended up agreeing to go "look for food." Wandering downtown of a Friday night looking for a bar with all the NYU undergrads running wild all over the place was a terrible idea. We eventually took the train to a reliable bar in Brooklyn, had a drink, Movie-boy started yawning, and we decided to call it a night. A valiant effort by all parties. But unfortunately, I got an email the following day saying "we should hang out again when I'm not so tired and you're not getting over a cold!" I really doubt it was the cold, though. I'm going to have to be direct and let him know I'm not interested. Not looking forward.
Date #3 (first date) with the ESL instructor. This was a girl on OKC whom I emailed randomly because I thought she looked intriguing in her photos and her profile seemed to hint at things but gave few details. I kind of wanted to find out what she was all about, but didn't expect to actually hear back from her. On the contrary, she responded quickly and asked questions back, and we were soon emailing back and forth once a day or so. We decided to meet up this weekend, and the only day we were both free happened to be Sunday. The fact that it was V-day went (thankfully) unacknowledged, and we decided to have afternoon tea at Tea&Sympathy, this British tea house in Greenwich Village that we'd both heard a lot about. Conversation was good - she was a really good listener and as the date went on, began to tell really good stories. After several hours at the tea house, we decided to take a walk in the neighborhood. First to look at the dogs in Union Square (none, sadly), and then to go walk on the High Line. She's been in the city for many years and knew a ton about all the buildings and the piers and the high line itself, and just seemed like a great person to explore with. We ended up at the Cubby Hole, a tiny lesbian bar in the village, where we had a drink, but since it was really crowded and loud, decided to move the party to Brooklyn (a trend?), and ended up at Ginger's, another lesbian bar, this one in Park Slope. The conversation flowed really well, we went from city life to our childhoods to coming out stories to bizarre work stories. Every once in a while, it would get quiet, and we'd be like, "I'm so glad we did this!" Basically, it was a totally cute first date. Finally, something like six hours later, we decided to call it a night and said goodbye at the subway station. Traded texts when we got home. I think we'll be hanging out again.
Date #4 (another first date) with the native Brooklynite. This was tonight, a rescheduling of last Friday's attempt to meet at an installation at PS1 called The Meeting. So, instead of going to the installation (which they open an hour before sunset and is just a room with a hole in the ceiling and orange light that makes the exposed section of the sky look super-super blue), we ended up just meeting for a tea date at a tea house sort of half-way between our houses. I had walked from a yoga class and she was already there when I got there. We ended up chatting on the couch for about an hour before the place closed down and for another, like, 15-20 minutes outside while she had a cigarette and then just standing in the snow. She's super-cute in a punk girl kind of way, but I couldn't tell if she was shy or kind of thought I was not her type or something like that. We talked about all kinds of stuff, she seems like an adventurer in the world, which is really attractive, but I couldn't exactly get a read on whether she was comfortable, much less romantically inclined. No future dates were discussed, though we did talk about music venues in the city and out-of-the-way places to go. I'll probably email her after all the houseguests leave and try to set up an adventure. I'm really curious what she thought.
Whew, okay, that was the longest post ever. Thanks for reading this far. There's something about spilling your guts to the internet like this that makes me feel a little self-conscious. I know the whole "does blogging=exhibitionism?" question is so 2003, but I've never blogged about personal stuff before. So, double sorry for the navel gazing. But there are some more dates in the works, so I'm going to suck it up and power through. And then we'll vote! (Just kidding.) Later, dudes!
Date #2 with Movie-boy. To refresh your memory: I contacted him first, we geeked out on the first date at an ale house, but I did not see any definite sparks. He called the very next day to suggest a movie later in the week, and heeding the internet's advice, I decided to give it another whirl. So. I'm not going to generalize this particular experience into a definitive answer to the "can spark grow when there's no spark at first," but in this case, the answer is a definite no.
The date itself was pretty good. We went to the a la carte section of Whole Foods for a bite, because it's kind of a pain to find vegan restaurants and because it's cheap if you're already going out. We sat upstairs and chatted, then wandered over to the Rubin Museum, which has a great Friday night movie thing where you buy a drink and get to take it into the movie theater which has chairs and tables with little tea lights instead of movie theater seating. The movie was totally weird and kind of hilarious, and I enjoyed the atmosphere, which was equally divided between old couples who are still totally doing date night and young people clearly on first dates.
So, Movie-boy kept kind of shifting in his seat every time I would move and I could tell right then that something was up. I should have known - but was nevertheless surprised - when he pulled the yaaaawn-and-now-my-arm-is-around-your-shoulders magic trick! I am not kidding. This move, which I thought could only be observed in action in the fictional world of Happy Days, is apparently alive and flourishing. To his credit, I think it was a risky move. But, um, having neither attempted nor received any flirtatious gestures whatsoever up to this point, it was just a bit much. The conversation all night had felt a bit mechanical. A lot of stuff about work, occasionally a polite question about family members or friends, but there was never a point where I felt we were really connecting. Anyway, after breaking the physical contact barrier, he did a lot of shoulder and arm stroking for the rest of the movie, which was not off-putting, but again definitely not inspiring, either.
If I were smart, I would have said thank you for a lovely evening right after the movie. But alas, I did not think quickly and ended up agreeing to go "look for food." Wandering downtown of a Friday night looking for a bar with all the NYU undergrads running wild all over the place was a terrible idea. We eventually took the train to a reliable bar in Brooklyn, had a drink, Movie-boy started yawning, and we decided to call it a night. A valiant effort by all parties. But unfortunately, I got an email the following day saying "we should hang out again when I'm not so tired and you're not getting over a cold!" I really doubt it was the cold, though. I'm going to have to be direct and let him know I'm not interested. Not looking forward.
Date #3 (first date) with the ESL instructor. This was a girl on OKC whom I emailed randomly because I thought she looked intriguing in her photos and her profile seemed to hint at things but gave few details. I kind of wanted to find out what she was all about, but didn't expect to actually hear back from her. On the contrary, she responded quickly and asked questions back, and we were soon emailing back and forth once a day or so. We decided to meet up this weekend, and the only day we were both free happened to be Sunday. The fact that it was V-day went (thankfully) unacknowledged, and we decided to have afternoon tea at Tea&Sympathy, this British tea house in Greenwich Village that we'd both heard a lot about. Conversation was good - she was a really good listener and as the date went on, began to tell really good stories. After several hours at the tea house, we decided to take a walk in the neighborhood. First to look at the dogs in Union Square (none, sadly), and then to go walk on the High Line. She's been in the city for many years and knew a ton about all the buildings and the piers and the high line itself, and just seemed like a great person to explore with. We ended up at the Cubby Hole, a tiny lesbian bar in the village, where we had a drink, but since it was really crowded and loud, decided to move the party to Brooklyn (a trend?), and ended up at Ginger's, another lesbian bar, this one in Park Slope. The conversation flowed really well, we went from city life to our childhoods to coming out stories to bizarre work stories. Every once in a while, it would get quiet, and we'd be like, "I'm so glad we did this!" Basically, it was a totally cute first date. Finally, something like six hours later, we decided to call it a night and said goodbye at the subway station. Traded texts when we got home. I think we'll be hanging out again.
Date #4 (another first date) with the native Brooklynite. This was tonight, a rescheduling of last Friday's attempt to meet at an installation at PS1 called The Meeting. So, instead of going to the installation (which they open an hour before sunset and is just a room with a hole in the ceiling and orange light that makes the exposed section of the sky look super-super blue), we ended up just meeting for a tea date at a tea house sort of half-way between our houses. I had walked from a yoga class and she was already there when I got there. We ended up chatting on the couch for about an hour before the place closed down and for another, like, 15-20 minutes outside while she had a cigarette and then just standing in the snow. She's super-cute in a punk girl kind of way, but I couldn't tell if she was shy or kind of thought I was not her type or something like that. We talked about all kinds of stuff, she seems like an adventurer in the world, which is really attractive, but I couldn't exactly get a read on whether she was comfortable, much less romantically inclined. No future dates were discussed, though we did talk about music venues in the city and out-of-the-way places to go. I'll probably email her after all the houseguests leave and try to set up an adventure. I'm really curious what she thought.
Whew, okay, that was the longest post ever. Thanks for reading this far. There's something about spilling your guts to the internet like this that makes me feel a little self-conscious. I know the whole "does blogging=exhibitionism?" question is so 2003, but I've never blogged about personal stuff before. So, double sorry for the navel gazing. But there are some more dates in the works, so I'm going to suck it up and power through. And then we'll vote! (Just kidding.) Later, dudes!
Friday, February 12, 2010
Monday, February 8, 2010
Date 1: Geeking out over beers
So I had my first OKC date last night with the boy with the classic movie character profile name. (I messaged him to say that he'd inspired me to watch the movie.)
We met up around 7 at a cute little ale house in Brooklyn Heights and ended up geeking out for a couple of hours over film, grad school applications (his), dissertations (mine), academic publishing...all things I try not to trot out on the first date, cause people tend to find that stuff boring. We had the obligatory conversation about how we got to New York, what we think of our respective neighborhoods, and the daily commute. (That seems to be a more standard thing to talk about around here, though I think it's actually way more boring, cause you know, show, don't tell, right?) After 1.5 rounds (we split his second one), I was pretty starving, so we wandered over to a falafel place down the street where he insisted on buying me a falafel. There was talk of going to museums together (he wants to learn more about art) and movies as we stood on a streetcorner. There was an awkward hug, and then we skipped off to our respective subway stops.
So, this is where I admit that I have no idea what I think about this one. On the one hand, movie-character-boy seems super smart in a totally unpretentious way. He admits when he doesn't know a lot about something and shows an interest in my take on things. He's super-courteous, perhaps a little shy even, but not in a way that makes me feel like I have to drive the conversation. He's not exactly super-hot, but not unattractive: thin, glasses, short hair, closely-cropped beard and mustache, and kind of on the young-looking side. If I had to place a bet, I would predict a comb-over in middle age. But that can be cute in a professorial kind of way, right? Anyway, I can't tell if it was first-date shyness, manners, or a lack of chemistry, but there was no flirty joking, spontaneous touching, or anything like that. Now that I think about it, I'm realizing that I really wasn't as playful or silly as I usually am with my friends. I'm really into this kid's brains, but I wonder what he'd be like on the dance floor. I'm kind of looking for both. So, should I give it another go? Perhaps in a more spontaneous atmosphere? I wouldn't want to get stuck in the museum-movie zone with him, unless it were understood that we were just going to be friends/activity partners. But on the other hand, I worry about drawing people out this way and making them think I'm really into them when I'm just being playful and getting a sense of what they're like in different situations. Hmmm...this might take some planning.
*update* Movie-boy just called about going out again on Friday and the movie he suggested is...wait for it...The Man Who Fell to Earth! Okay, I will stop being a judgmental beyotch now. Woohoo!
We met up around 7 at a cute little ale house in Brooklyn Heights and ended up geeking out for a couple of hours over film, grad school applications (his), dissertations (mine), academic publishing...all things I try not to trot out on the first date, cause people tend to find that stuff boring. We had the obligatory conversation about how we got to New York, what we think of our respective neighborhoods, and the daily commute. (That seems to be a more standard thing to talk about around here, though I think it's actually way more boring, cause you know, show, don't tell, right?) After 1.5 rounds (we split his second one), I was pretty starving, so we wandered over to a falafel place down the street where he insisted on buying me a falafel. There was talk of going to museums together (he wants to learn more about art) and movies as we stood on a streetcorner. There was an awkward hug, and then we skipped off to our respective subway stops.
So, this is where I admit that I have no idea what I think about this one. On the one hand, movie-character-boy seems super smart in a totally unpretentious way. He admits when he doesn't know a lot about something and shows an interest in my take on things. He's super-courteous, perhaps a little shy even, but not in a way that makes me feel like I have to drive the conversation. He's not exactly super-hot, but not unattractive: thin, glasses, short hair, closely-cropped beard and mustache, and kind of on the young-looking side. If I had to place a bet, I would predict a comb-over in middle age. But that can be cute in a professorial kind of way, right? Anyway, I can't tell if it was first-date shyness, manners, or a lack of chemistry, but there was no flirty joking, spontaneous touching, or anything like that. Now that I think about it, I'm realizing that I really wasn't as playful or silly as I usually am with my friends. I'm really into this kid's brains, but I wonder what he'd be like on the dance floor. I'm kind of looking for both. So, should I give it another go? Perhaps in a more spontaneous atmosphere? I wouldn't want to get stuck in the museum-movie zone with him, unless it were understood that we were just going to be friends/activity partners. But on the other hand, I worry about drawing people out this way and making them think I'm really into them when I'm just being playful and getting a sense of what they're like in different situations. Hmmm...this might take some planning.
*update* Movie-boy just called about going out again on Friday and the movie he suggested is...wait for it...The Man Who Fell to Earth! Okay, I will stop being a judgmental beyotch now. Woohoo!
Monday, February 1, 2010
I've got some dates lined up!
You guys, I have two dates lined up from OKC! After not getting any responses for a while and a bunch of inappropriate or just totally weird messages, I'm feeling a tiny bit of relief. Yey, I'm not a loser!
Friday is a girl who messaged me about biking in the cold with whom I've had a nice back-and-forth the last few days. We're going to a movie. The second is a guy whom I messaged about his unique profile name - it is a movie character that inspired me to actually watch the movie. Unfortunately, I couldn't stay awake though it... But, I am certain it was because I was tired.
There is another craigslist girl who keeps doing this "we should hang out" thing, but when I suggest a time/place, she either takes days to respond or says something like "I'll let you know." The last time she called in advance to suggest we hang out on a Monday without wanting to specify a time/place, and then left a message on Sunday saying something like she was busy in the evening, but we should hang out during the day. Um, yea. Some of us have work. I'm trying really hard not to be annoyed by this behavior, but I may have to just be "really busy" next time I hear from her. And, now that I've got these two dates lined up, it may not be so far from the truth.
Now, just to pick the outfits and deal with the nerves...
Friday is a girl who messaged me about biking in the cold with whom I've had a nice back-and-forth the last few days. We're going to a movie. The second is a guy whom I messaged about his unique profile name - it is a movie character that inspired me to actually watch the movie. Unfortunately, I couldn't stay awake though it... But, I am certain it was because I was tired.
There is another craigslist girl who keeps doing this "we should hang out" thing, but when I suggest a time/place, she either takes days to respond or says something like "I'll let you know." The last time she called in advance to suggest we hang out on a Monday without wanting to specify a time/place, and then left a message on Sunday saying something like she was busy in the evening, but we should hang out during the day. Um, yea. Some of us have work. I'm trying really hard not to be annoyed by this behavior, but I may have to just be "really busy" next time I hear from her. And, now that I've got these two dates lined up, it may not be so far from the truth.
Now, just to pick the outfits and deal with the nerves...
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Not a date.
So, messaging.
I've gotten a couple of random messages from people on OKC, mostly from people who seem nice, but not really what I'm looking for. One lady asked me for a recipe and we're now having an interesting discussion about architecture. A couple of couples have asked me to be their third (thanks, but no thanks)...probably because I listed myself as bisexual (there's no "queer" option!). But one fellow in particular made my day. Here's what he had to say (no subject line):
Well if you're looking for depraved little hovels in brooklyn I just found an intersting place across from the film studio I work at. It's on the Navy Yard so it's where dock workers used to drown their sorrows but now it's just broken down and ocasionally you can find hassidic men getting lapdances from scantily clad back women. It's not a strip club but there's something up. Anyway I work till like 11 every weeknight and it's right across the street if your down. I'm not all that great at transcribing small talk so i guess i'll keep this short. Brevity's the best platform for sincerity, right?... You look interesting and you're a good kisser. I wanna meet you.
Sincerely,
Sean
Mind you, I mentioned nothing about depraved hovels or wanting to check some out. The closest I came was to say that I like to take bike rides to random places. But by places, I meant like Corona Park or the Rockaways. Hilarious. And as fun as it sounds, um, I don't think so. Maybe if things get really desperate.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Hello, my future dates!
So, I've been following this crazy group saga since the beginning with rapt attention and not a small amount of jealousy. But I knew I couldn't join in until well after the holidays, because I was going out of town. Now that I'm back, I'm super-excited to get in on the action! (Yes, pun intended.)
Since I moved back to NYC this fall, I've been taking steps to meet new people and put myself out there more. I've been adamantly single for a couple of years now, which I think has done me a lot of good. I'm a bit more laid back and optimistic about relationships now. I have a pretty good idea of what I want and don't want. And most importantly, I'm kind of ready to jump back into the pool. Last week, I joined up on OKC and have been having a lot of fun ogling people's profiles and secretly adding to my favorites list. I will soon send messages to a bunch of them and start getting out there.
I do have one question I want to throw out there for discussion: what do you do when you get a message from somebody who seems nice, but you have a gut feeling that they're not your type? Judging from the OKC blog, it seems like a lot of people just don't respond to messages from people they're not into. My gut tells me this is kind of rude, but on the other hand, perhaps there is a whole other etiquette calculus to online dating: don't respond unless the person has a chance with you. What do you do?
ETA: I'm from G*, but this is not my G name. PM me if you really want to know!
Since I moved back to NYC this fall, I've been taking steps to meet new people and put myself out there more. I've been adamantly single for a couple of years now, which I think has done me a lot of good. I'm a bit more laid back and optimistic about relationships now. I have a pretty good idea of what I want and don't want. And most importantly, I'm kind of ready to jump back into the pool. Last week, I joined up on OKC and have been having a lot of fun ogling people's profiles and secretly adding to my favorites list. I will soon send messages to a bunch of them and start getting out there.
I do have one question I want to throw out there for discussion: what do you do when you get a message from somebody who seems nice, but you have a gut feeling that they're not your type? Judging from the OKC blog, it seems like a lot of people just don't respond to messages from people they're not into. My gut tells me this is kind of rude, but on the other hand, perhaps there is a whole other etiquette calculus to online dating: don't respond unless the person has a chance with you. What do you do?
ETA: I'm from G*, but this is not my G name. PM me if you really want to know!
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