I went up to Tampa again yesterday with a bunch of my friends to do some mountain biking, and I invited Falafel Tattoo to go with us. I was super nervous to invite him along with all my friends, but they know that I'm trying to meet people online and I thought they'd all get along just fine. I mean, my friends are pretty cool and all, so it would have worked. Except, it didn't. He thought we'd be riding the paved paths, but we were riding the wooded trails. So, he had his road bike, and we all had mountain bikes. We discovered this through a phone call, about a minute before we took off on the trails, so oh well, he didn't come with us.
Then the plan was to meet back up at his apartment to watch football. I had to separate from my buddies on the trail in order to get back in time, and as I was riding on the paved path past the ranger station, I heard the pop and violent hiss of my rear tire shredding to pieces. Falafel offered to pick me up, drop me off to shower at his apartment, and then go get - wait for it - falafel sandwiches for football grubbin. We watched my team win the AFC championships (yay, go Colts!) and then part of the NFC game before I made my awkward transition to leave.
It was kind of boring: as much as we both love football, it was just a bit weird watching my favorite team with someone who isn't as fanatic as I am. I just felt awkward, and my insecurities were manifesting into anxiety issues, and well. It was just awkward. I feel awkward about it, which in turn, makes me feel awkward about him. I don't see a romantic relationship there. And, though I thought I might be attracted to him, I'm not really.
He's coming down to my town next weekend to hang out with one of his buddies, and then to ride bikes with me. I'm hoping this just turns into a friend thing naturally, without me having to say it. Because I'm a big, insecure, self-conscious baby who shouldn't be dating at all because I can't handle it. That's all.