Monday, January 4, 2010

Like a herd of turtles

Okayy, it is January 4 and time for me to stop dragging my feet on this! One of my reasons for being slow about starting the datealong is the presence of a "maybe," a cute fellow who has figured rather prominently in my last few weeks.... but we've both backed off a bit, and things might still happen, but I also know he's fresh out of another relationship AND planning on moving away in a few months, so it's good for me to check myself and remember that whatever happens will probably not be serious or long-term.

Which brings me to my goal in doing this datealong project: to learn to take dating more lightly, take things less seriously, and not put tons of pressure on myself or the dude when I like someone. I get wrapped up in people I like too quickly, and could really benefit from learning to be patient and back off a bit. I have been able to achieve that best in those times that I've been dating more than one dude. So, the idea here is to go on LOTS of dates, with LOTS of dudes, in a short amount of time. And internet dating, your one-stop love-shop, is a great way to find just that: lots of dates with lots of different people.

So here is my strategy. I've been (secretly) marking people as "favorites" for a couple weeks now, and am currently at 19. I figure I will pick out 20 favorites, then send 10 messages in one day, 10 the next. I don't know whether I should do them right together, so I figure I'll send the first 10 and see how many respond in a day or two---I have found that lots of people just plain don't respond on OKC. (Of course, I have hardly responded to ANYone who's written ME so far, so I probably show up as replying "very selectively" on searches which probably scares people off...have I mentioned I could also benefit from being less picky?!)

Okay. Going to the gym now, then.......... launch time. Will report back.
(And a date tomorrow night with maybe-boy... but I think it will only do me good to know there are other options out there!!)


1 comment:

  1. I'm very interested to hear how your emails go--if you get responses and how many.

    And yes, I agree that it's a good thing to go on dates with other people as well as the maybe-boy. I'm bad about getting myself wrapped up in the idea of one person, too. I've never been a 'dater' so it's a whole new concept to think about how that might affect my functioning with a guy.